This isn’t really a review of the book, just the portrayal of neurodivergence. There was a lot to in this book, but I’ll let other speak to that.

I’m usually wary of books with characters the author has labeled “neurodivergent,” because so often that simply means the character will be autism-coded and fit all of the major stereotypes of what autism looks . Neurodivergence is much bigger than autism, and there’s a huge range of neurodivergent experiences in the world—neurodivergent people are just as diverse as neurotypical people, after all. Diagnoses overlap and are often difficult to untangle in real life, and with real-life people you can’t just look at their outwardly observable behaviors to determine their diagnosis.

Unfortunately, the vast majority of romances with neurodivergent characters don’t reflect this reality at all. The same limited number of stories is told over and over again, and in particular, authors usually only write about autism and ADHD, though they give themselves plausible deniability by using only the “neurodivergent” label and nothing more specific.

As an autistic person who tries to read about as many different neurodivergent experiences as possible, some of my best reading experiences have been when books by other neurodivergent people shine a light on the myriad ways our experiences are both similar and different. I’ve learned so much from reading about others’ experiences and the complicated ways various diagnoses manifest themselves.

I wish I could say that this book was one of those experiences, but it wasn’t. My past experiences with Cat Sebastian tell me this book was almost certainly written with good intentions, but the execution fell flat. I was able to predict before reading a single page exactly what Alex’s character would be , because he is the same collection of stereotypes that writers in all forms of fictional media have been using as shorthand for “autistic” for a very long time. And although Sebastian hasn’t specified, it’s highly unly this character is not meant to be autistic, because I just don’t see how you accidentally write a character with basically all of the major autism stereotypes. In any event, someone knowledgeable about neurodivergence should be aware of the stereotypes and able to navigate them, regardless of what diagnosis they intend the character to have, and that was not done here.

Nine out of ten “neurodivergent” characters written by non-autistic authors will have the following traits: bad at any and all conversations, and socially awkward in a way that’s chalked up to not caring about social rules; rigid, in that they adhere to a strict, unchanging daily or weekly schedule and prefer for things to always be the same because they believe their way of doing things is the most logical, efficient, or correct; punctual and fastidious; overly literal, often emotionless, and usually humorless; and with sensory issues that can be easily accommodated, such as being picky about food (but not intolerably so) and not liking loud or crowded places. There will be little recognition of why these or any other traits develop, or how they are necessary to allow the person to function and to regulate their emotions and nervous system.

Any traits that are truly difficult, disabling, uncomfortable for neurotypical people, and that can’t be fully accommodated by gentle acceptance from the love interest will be omitted: the character won’t have special interests, stims, executive functioning differences, sensory processing issues that affect their daily life, pragmatic language differences that cannot be overcome by sufficient familiarity with a person, neuromotor issues, and so on (and they definitely won’t have any traits typically associated with other diagnoses). Even if the character isn’t diagnosed, they’ll be fully aware of all of their autistic traits, able to correctly attribute their issues to their traits, and, by the end of the book, will fully accept them, as will their love interest, who will often be able to innately understand the autistic character’s needs in a way the autistic character cannot. The autistic character will probably require some form of “management” from their non-autistic partner.

Portrayals this feel hollow to me because they don’t look at what it’s to live with these traits on a daily basis. The character will often seem they’re able to simply put their autism away in a box and ignore it thanks to the acceptance of their partner. There’s much more focus on what it's for the non-autistic person to live with an autistic person, not what it's to be an autistic person in a neurotypical world. And above all, the love interest and the narrative will never, ever let you forget that the autistic character is weird and different and most people they meet have a hard time getting along with them, but not the love interest and maybe a few friends, who are special.

There are so many autistic and other neurodivergent stories that are left out of current “neurodivergent representation” in romance. You almost always have to turn to ownvoices stories to get something that feels real. I wish more authors would take the time to read the stories being told by neurodivergent people and reflect those in their writing. Where are all the autistic people with ADHD? Neurodivergences other than autism, ADHD, and dyslexia? Non-speakers? Trans autists? Autistic people with excellent pragmatic language skills? Neurodivergent people who can’t reliably work? People who need daily accommodations? Where is the vast majority of the neurodivergent community that doesn’t fit into the little tiny boxes that romance authors keep trying to put us in? And where is the concern about how harmful it is to continue to perpetuate stereotypes of what autism and other neurodivergences look ? Those harms are very real and present on a daily basis for us, but are apparently easily ignored by authors who are personally unaffected by them.

I really love Cat Sebastian’s work and have always trusted her to portray diverse experiences with nuance and care. The Cabots series is one of my all-time favorites and I was maybe more excited about getting another Cabot book than any other release this year. So it was really disappointing to read the same stereotypical character I’ve read in so many other books, when I was hoping against hope after reading the content note that this might be a book that carefully explored the complex real-life experience of a fellow neurodivergent person. It was painful to be reminded, yet again, of why I keep having conversations with other autistic people about how telling people you’re autistic probably won’t actually help you (and will most ly hurt you) because people only know the stereotypes and will hold you to them.

I want to give Sebastian the benefit of the doubt here, but after reading so many books that make “quirky” autistic characters feel a trend, it’s hard. It’s not that there’s no room in fiction for these stereotypical traits, but they have to be written with intention, and I think writers owe it to their neurodivergent readers to make their intentions clear. Slapping a vague “neurodivergent” label on a book with no further explanation and no discussion in the acknowledgements of any research or sources just isn’t cutting it for me anymore, because too many authors have written poor neurodivergent representation to get diversity points and refused to take any accountability for it. It really isn’t hard to tell when people are writing from real-life experience and when they aren’t—and when they’re writing for their neurodivergent audience vs their neurotypical one. Sebastian just didn’t do enough in this book to earn my trust as an autistic reader.

I wish neurodivergent representation in romance was opening people’s eyes to the incredibly diverse experiences in the neurodivergent community. Unfortunately, there’s still a very long way to go.arc read-in-2022 romance ...more40 s erraticdemon150 44

5 stars

If you haven't noticed by now, I am a big Cat Sebastian fan. She just gets me, ok? Especially the Cabot books that she describes as "vibes" and "people crying while wearing sweaters" and "generationally queer" which Tommy calls them in this exact book. Which is exactly right.

What I loved most about this book is how much space Daniel and Alex make for each other. The story starts with them already as friends and together in every sense besides fucking so there is immediately domestic slowburn vibes which continue the entire time. Alex is an immigrant, a doctor, and neurodivergent, all of which are treated with care in the writing. Daniel is from a wealthy family but is still a cinnamon roll and a dirtbag who starts a community garden on a city-owned abandoned lot. The book is a story of these two finding their way as independent people, as a couple, and as a community.

This part is probably only interesting to me but there is also a tiny bit of government bureaucracy and urban planning as a treat. How a book based on vibes snuck in details on back taxes, insurance fraud, the City taking property, and apartment conversions to co-ops is a credit to how masterful Cat is with her writing.

In conclusion, Daniel Cabot Puts Down Roots is a lovely addition to the Cabots series. If you want a mostly vibes domestic slowburn with sweater clad crying boys this is the book for you!

I received an ARC copy of this book from the author in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.29 s Papie746 157

This entire series is just lovely. Here we are in East Village, NYC, in 1973. I love NYC. I love the 70s. This was right up my alley. I loved the entire Cabot family, including Daniel, and I adored Alex. I loved all the secondary characters. Mostly I loved the vibe. It’s a series that just vibes with a time period, and I was vibing right along.

Best friends who-are-everything but lovers, to best-friends-lovers-everything-life-partners. The relationship development was just perfect.

And the romance:
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